


i only have eyes for you

by DanFanRonpa



Series: to be invisible [1]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Feelings Realization, Fluff, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Kuroko wants to be seen, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pre-Relationship, References to Depression, Romance, Takao can see him, a match made in heaven
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:48:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29630019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanFanRonpa/pseuds/DanFanRonpa
Summary: Kuroko's not used to being seen. He finds that he quite likes it.
Relationships: Kuroko Tetsuya/Takao Kazunari
Series: to be invisible [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2184522
Comments: 3
Kudos: 40





	i only have eyes for you

He gets tired of it, eventually. It's tiring to have to always announce his presence and then add on his so-called infamous line of 'I've been here all along'. He's had to say that over and over again since he was little and it's... 

It's tiring. 

Somewhere along the way, it had become second-nature. He'd stopped thinking about it and just said it automatically like a broken record. 

That's not the only tiring thing about his low presence. He hates the way everyone gets scared by his voice or him suddenly appearing in front of them. But, no one seems to see that it hurts more than just them. It hurt him too, to see someone freak out in front of him as if he were some sort of supernatural creature.

Silently, he wonders if it would ever end. 

His mother had the same problem, but she combated it with her quirky personality, purposefully and carefully raising her voice and often using sunglasses to hide her eyes. 

Apparently, the problem with them was their eyes. Because they couldn't express their emotions through their eyes as most people could, it resulted in the people around them skimming over them and their presence, something usually solidified with emotions and passion, decreased until it was hardly there. 

Kuroko sighed and threw his empty cup, previously filled with the vanilla milkshake he adores so much. Usually, he'd be refilling it, but he felt somewhat sick. 

He looked back from the bin where Kagami was happily gorging himself on the mountain of burgers before him. Normally, the red-head would have seen him only moments after he sat down. Today, he hadn't noticed at all. 

Maybe because he's relapsing? 

Now, he wasn't relapsing in the dangerous way. It was just a few recurring thoughts. About how... invisible he was. Is. 

It had been worse after Meikou and before the summer break, depression and listlessness rendering him almost completely invisible. He doubted that anyone then would have been able to see him, no matter how hard they tried. 

That didn't mean that it wasn't bad now. After all, there were moments like now wherein people didn't see him at all, regardless of how much time passed and how hard he stared at them.

Kuroko pursed his lips and left Maji Burger, readjusting his hold on his bag. He ignored the tears shining in his eyes. Though, he supposes, no one would see them anyway. 

* * *

"Shin-chan!" Takao grinned, poking at the Miracle. Midorima scowled as usual and turned to ignore him. "Geez, Shin-chan!" He drawled, "Practising today? Or you got plans? A date, maybe?" 

Midorima huffed, his grip tight around his lucky item - a small glue stick with a red label. He held his back with his free hand and walked away. "Not today. My father will pick me up today. I have something of admittedly more importance scheduled for today." 

"So no rickshaw today?" He brightened. Today just got a whole lot better. 

Don't get him wrong, there was a reason he pulled the rickshaw and it wasn't just to please his stubborn teammate. He wanted, after all, to make him acknowledge him and his strength. It was ironic, in a sense. Takao came to this school so that he could beat the Generation of Miracles and instead became one of their teammates and - dare he say it - friends. It stopped being about rivalry and instead turned into chasing after this teen. 

Part of him hated himself for it. After all, he's seeking acknowledgement from someone he previously vowed to beat. But, he couldn't help it. No matter how hard he tried, he continued to seek validation from someone who made him feel invalid. 

Well, no use pondering so hard on it. 

"That's right." Midorima agreed and left. "Goodbye, for now, Takao."

He grinned. Midorima never used to do that. Say his goodbyes, that is. The way he did was melodramatic, but it was a goodbye nonetheless. It was an improvement. 

He sough almost dreamily. If only his Junior High friends would make like Midorima and grow up. He's seen their social media pages and their hate for the Generation of Miracles stood strong, even today. In his opinion, if he could get over it and work with one of them, then they should at least keep their hate to themselves.

Still, he couldn't fault them entirely. The way they crushed their opponents during the championship league and nationals was more than overboard. He wouldn't be surprised if Meikou still hadn't recovered from their cruel execution. 

He was shaken out of his thoughts by an announcement of trains being delayed. He wondered when he came to the train station. It was his destination, but Takao didn't remember walking. Did he automatically go here? 

Well, he doesn't need to think about that now-- 

Oh God, someone was on the verge of crying. He could see it, in the corner of his vision. Familiar, sky-blue hair and shimmering eyes of the same colour. Speaking of eyes, they looked much duller than usually. 

No, that's wrong. Whenever he'd seen them before, they'd been carefully blank, purposefully made that way to utilise his misdirection. But now, they were lifeless.

He swallowed. He'd seen those eyes plenty of times. One too many, some would say. He saw them on himself during those dark days of Junior High. 

Takao moved through the crowd and made his way to the phantom. He cleared his throat and tapped his shoulder for good measure. "Hey, Kuroko. You okay?" Ah, that was careless.

Crass as it may have been, it seemed to set something off for Kuroko. He whipped around as if surprised that Takao knew he was there and as soon as he saw him, the tears began to fall. 

"Woah, hey, hey." He bit his bottom lip and set a hand on his shoulder. "Here, let's get you out of this cramped space." Kuroko didn't protest ~~( _couldn't have_ )~~ as Takao led him away, tugging on his sleeve and muttering small apologies as they brushed past a crowd of people. 

They made it out of the station without issue but Takao didn't stop there, instead dragging Kuroko out to the public court - the one no one seemed to use. The clean air was refreshing and would probably be good for Kuroko. 

Kuroko himself was still crying, silent as it was. The tears were flowing freely and his eyes were slowly reddening, the patch of skin under then already reddening from how harsh and often Kuroko rubbed them with the corner of his sleeves. 

"W-Wanna talk about it?" Takao offered awkwardly. As extroverted as he was, he had a hard time in these situations. God, he was pathetic. 

Kuroko drew in a sharp breath and shook his head, rubbing his eyes once more. "Sorry, Takao-kun." His voice sounded rasp and he had no doubt that his throat was sore. 

Takao's eyes narrowed. "Don't apologize." He scolded. "Not for this."

Kuroko opened his mouth but shut it a second later, no doubt trying to apologize once more. "I... I didn't expect Takao-kun to see me." 

"It's what I do best." He grinned with a wink. Distractions, he could do. "No matter what, Kuroko, I will always see you!" 

Kuroko burst into tears again. Oh, God, what did he do? 

"K-Kuroko?" Kuroko shook his head, pulling his knees up to his chest and burying his head in them. It was the most vulnerable he'd ever seen him. 

Takao cursed. He cried after Takao declared that he'll always see him. Was Kuroko uncomfortable with that? Well, the kid wasn't used to people seeing him. He doubts that he'd suddenly be alright with Takao, of all people, seeing him. 

... Unless that _was_ the problem.

A sudden wave of dread washed over him. Kuroko had spent most of his life being invisible to any normal person. And from his reaction in Inter-High, Takao doubted that Kuroko had encountered someone like him before. 

That was ten or so years of being ignored and barely given a second thought. Takao didn't know if he could handle even a day of being ignored. 

It had taken Kuroko a whole decade to snap. A whole decade worth of tears. 

Takao swallowed. Screw being uncomfortable. There was no way he was gonna put himself above this distraught teen. 

"Can... Can I touch you?" 

Kuroko raised his head, looking more tired than he'd ever seen. He glanced away. He gave a curt nod - a nod nonetheless. 

Takao scooted closer and wrapped an arm around Kuroko's shoulders, rubbing his shoulder with a thumb. Some time passed and Kuroko slowly unfolded himself, leaning closer to Takao, possibly for the physical warmth, but Takao guessed it was for the metaphysical comfort of someone being there. 

Cautiously, he hid Kuroko's face in his collar, resting his head on Kuroko's. Kuroko sighed, clutching onto the fabric of his clothes. His shirt was dampening at an alarming rate, but he held him close. Kuroko needed this. He spent years bottling it up and now he's getting a chance to let it all go. 

* * *

_Fireworks lit up the sky. Blue. Red. Green. Purple. Pink. White. A cacophony of colours filled the night sky. It made Kuroko smile._

_"Okay!" Momoi clapped her hands together. "New Years Resolution time!" She grinned happily. "I'll go first! My New Years Resolution is to become Tetsu-kun's bride!"_

_"That's hardly a resolution." Midorima scoffed, fiddling with his kimono sash - his lucky item. "Not one you can fulfil anyhow."_

_Momoi puffed her cheeks and stomped on the ground like a petulant child being grounded off their favourite toy. "Geez! Mido-kun, you're such a killjoy! I can be Tetsu-kun's bride, right?" She turned to Kuroko with wide, hopeful eyes._

_He was never one to beat around the bush. "Sorry, but no." Momoi didn't seem to hear his denial as she rebuked Midorima with a victorious huff. He would have been confused, but this was Momoi. This behaviour was expected by now. He sighed and turned to Aomine. "Aomine-kun, what about you?"_

_"Hm?" Aomine shrugged with a small yawn, shoving a few tempura prawns in his mouth, "Dunno." He drawled. "Probably... to beat Akashi at least ten times." He nodded to himself as if assuring himself of how legit his resolution was. "Yeah. That's good enough, right?"_

_"You should pick an achievable one, Mine-chin..." Murasakibara teased with that same-old bored tone. Aomine yelled indignantly._

_Akashi smiled lightly, "I accept your challenge, Aomine. Though, I won't hold back. I do hope you'll know that."_

_Aomine groaned, deflating, "I'm dead." Momoi giggled, apparently already snapped out of her Kuroko-daze._

_"Well, my resolution is to be Kurokocchi's lover!" Kise grinned brightly, high-fiving both of Momoi's hands as they cheered for their similar wishes._

_Kuroko backed away slightly, grateful as Aomine takes a small step in front of him. "Please change your resolution, Kise-kun." But, Kise ignored his words, still in a frenzy with Momoi._

_"You two are creepy." Murasakibara sang through a mouth full of sweets. "My resolution will be to... eat a bunch of foreign sweets."_

_Kuroko smiled at the very Murasakibara-like response. And it was a nice diversion from Kise and Momoi's... passionate resolutions._

_"Ah, that's a good one." Aomine grinned._

_"No, it is not." Midorima groaned, squeezing his sash. Kuroko wondered if he would need a stress toy. "You people need a better resolution to strive for. I'll admit, Aomine's is quite difficult, but you three can do better." Momoi huffed and pouted, Kise following her example and whining. Murasakibara didn't seem bothered in the slightest, simply reaching for another pack of sweets._

_"Calm down, Midorima." Akashi sighed, though Kuroko could see that he agreed. "Why don't you give us your resolution to serve as an example?"_

_Midorima breathed through his nose, took a sip of his water, and nodded. "My New Years Resolution will be to learn human anatomy and a handful of surgery processes off by heart."_

_Kuroko felt awe by the noble resolution. He knew Midorima strived to become a doctor, but he didn't expect him to be passionate about it. It was a shame he didn't know how to express what he felt other than his slow nods._

_Akashi smiled, "Quite moral of you, Midorima. I envy your honour at times like these."_

_"Nonsense." He shook off, "As much as I hate to admit it, you are far more condemnable than I."_

_"Maybe." Akashi agreed, crossing his legs as he drank from his glass. "I suppose it's my turn now?"_

_"Y-Yeah." Momoi nodded, shaking herself out of a daze - probably at Midorima's admission._

_"My resolution..." Akashi closed his eyes, swirling the water in his glass. In this position, he looked regal. Like a king. "I will become the second-best captain Teikou has ever seen."_

_"Second?" Aomine questioned. Kuroko was confused too. Akashi was never one to aim for anything less than the top._

_"Well," His eyes cracked open, a fond look casting over them, softening his features. "No one can beat Nijimura-senpai, right?"_

_Kuroko smiled. "That's right..." He mumbled, but he knew they'd hear him. Even if they had a hard time seeing them, his voice always reached them._

_Akashi placed his glass down and leaned forward towards him, "And you, Kuroko? What will your resolution be this year?"_

_Kuroko looked down at his single sweatband around his wrist. He'd taken to wearing it outside of basketball some time ago. It was comforting. He looked back up suddenly remembering that it was his turn and they were waiting for him._

_"This year... I want to stand out."_

* * *

Kuroko... He couldn't believe he'd just did that. The last time cried in front of someone, it had been in front of Akashi when he told him to give up. 

But even then it wasn't to this extent. He didn't need to time himself to know that he'd spent at least ten minutes crying on Takao's shoulder as he felt nothing but shame, pure and scalding. He couldn't deny the warmth he felt from Takao's generosity and willingness to just let him cry in front and on him. Especially after what he said in Inter-High about hating him.

Then again, he might just not like him in the case of basketball. Maybe, for once, he'd be able to sustain a friendship outside of basketball and not let the sport ruin it. 

That may just be asking for too much, Kuroko can't help but think. 

"Tet-chan?" Kuroko jolted. He... hadn't expected that. No one's ever called him by a nickname so fast. Even Aomine waited a few days before called him 'Tetsu'. "Ah, sorry." Takao smile sheepishly, "If you don't like it, I can stop." 

"Ah... No..." Kuroko shook his head, belatedly realising that he was still snuggled up close to Takao. But, the position was so comfortable. He couldn't bring himself to separate himself from the point guard. "It's fine." 

Takao cleared his throat, "Right." He felt more than he heard Takao take in a deep breath. "Um, you don't have to answer, but... Do you like being seen?" He froze, rigid in Takao's hold. "It's just... Well, I figured, since you usually get ignored by most that you'd... miss being seen?" 

"..."

"That's just me speculating!" Takao quickly added. Kuroko glanced up, spotting his flushed face. "You don't have to answer--!"

"That's right." Takao's mouth snapped shut with an audible click. He comforted him when he didn't need to and he stayed for him. This was the least Kuroko could do for him. "I've gotten used to not being seen, but it still..."

"... hurts?" Takao offered and Kuroko nodded.

"Yes. It still hurts." I want to stand out, Kuroko had once said to his friends, whom he trusted. And then they laughed as if he were joking. Even Akashi and Midorima looked amused. "I... don't like it. I don't like having to announce my presence, and I don't like when people get mad when I don't." 

As if he was in the wrong for being stuck with what he was born with. As if he could help his lack of presence. Unlike his mother, his lack of presence didn't magically disappear when his eyes were hidden. It didn't for her, but it definitely helped. For Kuroko, unless he covered his whole head, it was nearly impossible for people to see him even while looking. 

Except... Except Takao wasn't like that. Akashi wasn't either, but Akashi had hurt him in other ways - ways that cut much deeper than being ignored could. 

Takao had said he hated him, but only because they were similar on court. Outside of it, he had no reason (unless he'd done something to offend him). There was hope fluttering in Kuroko's chest that he doesn't think he's felt before. 

Or maybe that was something else. 

"I want to be seen, yes." He finally says, though only a second had passed. "And, you spotting me so easily was... It felt good." 

Takao's grip on his shoulder tightens ever so slightly. "Good. Because..." He removes his hands and pulls away, leaving Kuroko longing for that warmth back. In the next second, however, Takao grips both sides of his face. "I can see you! No matter how much you hide, I will always see you!" He tugged lightly on his cheeks, "So, you won't ever need to cry again!" 

He let his cheeks go and enveloped him in a hug. Kuroko found that he enjoyed this far more than their previous pose. It felt safe. Safe was good. 

* * *

Takao curled up in his bed, hands hiding his crimson face. 

Kuroko had very pretty eyes.


End file.
